Supermarket Mayhem

Copyright © 2019 James Russell Stoakes
All rights reserved.
http://JamesStoakes.com

The year was 1969, and Jimmy was going to be five in December. There was a lot going on then, that does not happen now, just like there is a lot going on now, that did not happen then.

Children roamed the streets and played outdoors unsupervised. They even rode bicycles without helmets. No one called the police.

Parents smoked around their young children. No one called the police on them either.

It was a simple time, and most kids had the simple instruction, “Be home before the street lights turn on.” Our rat pack was just one of many, and we all remember those days as the best we ever had.


Box of Donuts
Box of Donuts

Jimmy waited impatiently with his mother at the supermarket checkout line. “What was taking so long!” he wondered.

“The guys are waiting for me, mom!” Jimmy said. He wasn’t really sure if they were waiting for him. He was more afraid that they were not, and he would miss out on the latest adventure. It was summer, and he was told that in just three months, he would be back in school every day. He didn’t like kindergarten, and he was sure he would dislike first grade even more.

“We will only be a few more minutes, Jimmy,” she answered, “Go have a donut.”

“Donut?” Jimmy asked, surprised.

His mother pointed with her cigarette to the tables along the front wall past the checkout. There were open packages of donuts on the table. “Wednesdays are customer appreciation day. There are free donuts over there.”

Jimmy rushed over and reached up onto the table to grab a powder-covered donut. He wasn’t tall enough to see inside the box and was glad it was one that he liked. It was delicious. “Change of plans,” Jimmy thought to himself. “I have to tell the others about this.” Jimmy reached in blindly again and helped himself to a chocolate-covered donut and smiled at the bag boy.

“Don’t make a pig of yourself,” Jimmy’s mom said with a laugh as she snagged a donut for herself. “Let’s go,” she said, pushing the cart in front of her. Jimmy stuffed the rest of the donut into his mouth and grabbed another for the road.

“Free,” he thought to himself and smiled. “I like free.”


“Whatayamean free?” Scott asked Jimmy. Scott was Jimmy’s best friend, and they did everything together. His younger brother Jody was always hanging around too, but for some reason, Jimmy and Jody never got along. Jimmy had found them playing in the tall ragweed in the abandoned lot next to their house. They had cut some trails into the tall weeds and had a pile outside.

“Today is customer depreciation day, whatever that is,” Jimmy said, taking some cut ragweed and weaving it into the standing stalks along the path. “They have tables with donuts up front that are free to take.”

David and Ken came running up the street. “Hey, guys!” David called out. “What’s going on?” They looked at what Scott and Jimmy were doing and grabbed some ragweed to help.

“Jimmy says there are free donuts at the supermarket today,” Scott said as he wove.

“I like donuts!” Ken said. “What does free mean?”

“It means you don’t have to pay for them,” Jimmy said. “Take as many as you like. I had three this morning.”

“Sounds like stealing to me,” David said in a low tone. “I got whooped for stealing not too long ago.” He held his hands on his bottom for emphasis.

“It’s not stealing. I stood there, and everyone smiled at me while I ate them,” Jimmy insisted.

“We can go after lunch,” Scott said. “Jody and I have to be in for lunch, but we can meet back here after that.”

“I already ate,” Jimmy said, “So I’ll wait for you here.”

“Me too,” Dave and Ken both parroted.

“See you in a little bit,” Scott said and walked towards his house. Jody followed along quietly behind him.


Dave, Ken, and Jimmy all stayed busy weaving their ragweed fort together. They chattered about all kinds of topics while they worked, including the ripening fruit on the nearby property. They schemed about how to get over the wooden fence that surrounded the property.

“My mom says it’s a shame that all that fruit goes to waste,” Ken said. “She says the owner is too old to pick it now.”

Jimmy had an idea. “I think I can get us in and out,” he said.

They were interrupted by Scott running up to them, “You guys ready to go?”

“Ready when you are,” Jimmy said, jumping up. He couldn’t wait for more sweets donuts.

“Me too,” Dave said.

Everyone began walking. To get to the market, they had to cross the town yard. They didn’t like the kids being in there, but it was the quickest way, they just had to make it more than halfway before the workers tried to chase them out.

They made it across without confrontation today, the workers looked out, but the kids continued incursions into the yard must have been wearing them out. It was only two days ago that they had chased the boys off of the sand pile. The workers were too out of shape to climb the hill quickly or keep up with the kids once they were on solid ground.

The parking lot was the next hurdle. They had to be careful at their size. Cars whizzed by, and they were too short to be noticed by most of them. Only Jody had ever been hit, but only hard enough to push him away into another car. That was part of why Jimmy didn’t like him. If anything was to go wrong, it was always Jody that was in the middle of it.

The first store was one that the boys were not allowed in for some reason. Everything inside was in bottles, and they had no idea what it was. The next was where people took their clothes to wash them. Jimmy’s mom washed her own clothes, she laughed at the idea of taking her clothes to someone else.

There was a store for buying appliances. The boys often went behind the store to take large boxes that were left out back near the dumpster. Lastly, the supermarket, Stop & Shop, his mom called it.

“Walk into the store and go to the far side of the check out lines,” Jimmy said. “Then walk through and get a donut on the table up front.”

Scott went first. He made his way through the line and up to the tables without any problems. He nervously reached up and took a donut. Chocolate chocolate, “Yes!” he said under his breath and began savoring it. He took a second before walking away.

Jody followed and reached up. He was shorter than the others, so he had to get on tippy toes to get the edge of the box, which he dragged closer. The closest bagboy came over to help him. He held the box down so Jody could pick what he wanted.

“Where’s your mom?” the bagboy asked. Jody panicked a little and looked around. He pointed at a lady he knew in line that happened to be looking his way and waved happily. The lady smiled and waved back. Satisfied, the bagboy went back to work. Jody walked toward the woman and back through the lines after saying, “Hi!” to her. Jimmy briefly had a new respect for Jody after that performance.

Dave and Ken went up together. They each ate a donut and took one as they walked away. The manager walked to the table after the boys had left. He opened a couple new boxes and cleaned up the empty ones. Jimmy approached the table as the manager walked away.

“Weren’t you here earlier today?” the bagboy asked.

“Yep,” Jimmy said as he ate a donut, “we came back for more stuff,” he lied. The bagboy scowled as Jimmy took a second donut.

“Don’t you think you have had enough?” the bagboy asked. The manager had noticed the interaction and was walking over behind Jimmy.

“Enough donuts?” Jimmy asked. “I could eat these all day,” he said and rubbed his tummy.

“I would prefer that you did not,” a voice said over Jimmy’s shoulder. “Where is your mother?” he asked.

Jimmy tried to do has Jody had done earlier, but none of the young women were looking his way. “Getting some meat?” he said.

“You should be with her,” the manager said. Jimmy took the hint and moved quickly.

The manager stood and watched Jimmy go into the store until he could not see him in the crowd. He turned to go back to his station, and another young boy was eating donuts. Two others were arriving behind the first, and the manager was getting suspicious of their behavior.

He walked to Jody, “Where is your mother,” he asked.

Before Jody could answer, the bagboy said, “I asked the same question earlier. The woman he said was his mom, left a few minutes ago without him.”

“Really?!” the manager exclaimed and grabbed Jody’s shoulder.

Ken and Dave were smiling and eating another donut when the manager said, “You two stay right there. I’m calling the police.”

Scott burst from the checkout line, “Let go of my brother!” he screamed and flew at the manager with his full body weight. He was small, but he was moving when he grabbed the manager’s hand and tugged. It knocked Jody free of his grasp, “Run, Jody!” Scott yelled. He rolled under the table and began to scurrying to the end.

Jimmy walked up and took another donut right in front of the manager. “Free donuts,” he said.

The manager’s face got very red. “Get out!” he screamed at the boys. Everyone in line was watching now.

Someone in line called out, “Are the donuts free or not?”

“Is this your child, sir?” the manager asked.

While he was distracted, Jody, Scott, Dave, and Ken were taking as many donuts as they could carry.

“No, sir,” the man said, “but I would expect my child could go get a donut if he were here.”

The bagboy pointed to direct the manager.

“Stop that,” the manager said dancing around Jimmy to pursue the others. Jimmy quickly loaded up with several donuts as the manager departed.

The bagboy was reaching for Jimmy when the lady in line yelled at him, “Don’t touch him! Get back here and do your job!” She sounded angry, but she winked at Jimmy as he retreated with his treasure. Jimmy smiled at her as he left.

Halfway across the parking lot, the group rejoined and continued towards home. They circled around the yard this time and stuck to the trees. The manager’s threat of calling the police stuck in their heads, and they didn’t want to take any chances.

They made it back to their fort safely. Most of the evidence against them was gone except for a little chocolate here or there on their shirts.

“That was fun!” Jimmy said. “Not quite what I expected, but fun. Nice job in there, Jody!”

Scott looked like he wanted to smack Jimmy for a moment before his face lightened up, and he said, “It was fun.”